Emotions ran high at a Friday night board of education workshop, where five directors discussed Policy FFA, a 2012 guideline regarding student memorials that notably exclude the recognition of students and staff with deaths by suicide. In a show of solidarity, 35 students and parents from the 2024 graduating class supported a former classmate’s family in petitioning for the policy change.

Board of Education President Glenn Ely brought the meeting to order and began discussing the process to change the policy.

“We need a full board to deliver this information,” Ely began, acknowledging that two directors, Debbie Landolt and Jason Crowe were absent from the meeting. “This subject is in itself a subject. It is important to be really respectful of the family. All school board and staff are required to do suicide training. Shannan Holzschuh is the only one on the agenda.”

Shannan Holzschuh is the mother of Drake Holzschuh, a 15-year-old boy who committed suicide on April 21, 2021, in his home. Holzschuh was asked for assistance from her son’s classmates to change Policy FFA, which states: “Memorials for staff and students lost through suicide will not be established. This policy is the result of the fact that recognition of student suicide may adversely affect others predisposed to suicide.”

Ely permitted Holzschuh to make her request. She began by addressing the lack of inclusiveness in the policy, its age, and how much has changed since 2012 when the policy was implemented. She asked the board to “revisit the policy” and “take action following the review process.”

“Development of a uniform policy for student deaths regardless of the cause is highly recommended by the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (AFSP),” Holzschuh began. “Choosing to honor a student at graduation who died in a car accident but refusing to recognize a student who died by suicide is nothing less than an unjust punishment to the family and friends. If the student lived, he/she mattered. The cause of death is absolutely irrelevant. in both scenarios, the student was a valuable member of the class and is deserving of recognition. ‘You Matter’ is a powerful campaign motto used in suicide prevention. This becomes an empty message to students if we say ‘You matter’ unless you die by suicide. Because if you die by suicide, we will pretend you didn’t exist. These conflicting messages erode away the trust that students feel toward the adults in the education system.”

Holzschuh argued the message that the policy sends to students, that memorializing a student who died by suicide will adversely affect those who are predisposed to suicide.

“Please consider this faulty thought process. A student who is considering self-harm would be more included to think in this manner: ‘No one cared enough about Drake to remember or acknowledge him at graduation. If they don’t care about him, they won’t care about me either. I don’t matter, and everyone will just forget about me.’”

She said that acknowledging emotional despair felt in the wake of depression, anxiety, and overwhelming circumstances would give more empathy toward Drake and others who have died by suicide.

“Fear of contagion perpetuates stigma surrounding suicide,” Holzschuh said. “I am sure you would agree that a school district greatly influences the lives of adolescents. If schools teach youth to be afraid of talking about those who died by suicide, then this fear will be carried with them into life. Stigma will prevail. Others who face emotional and mental health challenges will remain silent and stuff their pain causing them to suffer alone. Who wants to talk about their problems if others only judge them and dismiss their feelings?”

Holzschuh said school districts have the opportunity to eliminate this fear in young people, and the focus should be on how the person lived rather than how they left the earth. Examining the policy is a highly effective place to start, she said.

“As Drake’s family, we struggle to press on through this nightmare each and every day to move forward in life without him,” Holzschuh said and fought to keep herself from crying.

Many of Drake’s classmates in the room began crying as well.

“This final act done out of utter despair by an adolescent whose brain wouldn’t be fully developed for another 10 years must not be the deciding factor of whether or not a chair is placed in living memory of him during graduation,” she continued. “My hope is that all of these compelling perspectives move you to reconsider your policy. Together we must stand up to fear and stigma of suicide. Drake is worth it! Not just because he is my child, but because he was once a beautiful, living, breathing human being in the halls of Owensville High School.

“Suicide doesn’t discriminate based on how ‘good’ your family is or isn’t. I beg you to examine this policy while wearing your parent hat. What would you want your child’s school district to decide?”

Ely thanked Holzschuh for her comments and began explaining the process moving forward.

“We are going to get into the nuts and bolts,” he said. “I really appreciate you taking the time sharing a concern.”

Ely began talking about the healthy process of discussing a change to board policy.

“You did exactly what we would ask somebody to do,” he told Holzschuh.

Ely said policy change doesn’t just need to take into account the subject, or the family, but on the governance of the board.

“The policy has to be delivered, considered, and thoughtful is part of us doing our diligence, which is what tonight and Tuesday night is about,” Ely said. “Even though it seems really, really obvious it is important that we adopt a practice and a precedence that when we — there are governing guidelines that we put that thorough thought and consideration for and that is part of the reason why it was important that we address this as quickly as we could and to build the comfort and confidence of both the process and of listening to the family, doing our diligence in a timely manner. Also, not to overload the beginning of the new school year, so all the board and the kiddos and families can start in the healthiest way possible.”

Ely said that the board will work through any questions or concerns they may have.

“It is important we give the person we employed the opportunity to speak, but it is not her purpose to change what the guidelines say, even if they need to be re-evaluated or approved.”

Ely said he spent two-and-a-half hours with Superintendent Dr. Jeri Kay Hardy earlier in the week reviewing the board’s policy and resources that have changed opinions regarding mental health. He held up a 48-page print-out “After a Suicide: A Toolkit for Schools” by the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention.

“Some subjects, sometimes we become aware and learn things that we don’t want to have to learn, but it is important that we do and take the opportunity to be well-informed,” Ely said. “That is what we are doing this week and next week and use what we learn in the adaptation. There is really only one addendum in that policy that we gave you. What we are considering is just adopting the policy that was presented by MSBA (Missouri School Board Association). The addendum lies in the (two sentences at the end) that you spoke to. Is it necessary if we pulled it?”

Ely explained again that one of the three purposes of the board of education is to make policy. With two board members missing, the evening would only be a workshop to discuss Policy FFA. No action would be taken until Aug. 15 during a second special meeting.

“It is important the missing two members have a say because each of us is just one voice and we need seven voices to go that they want to be included,” Ely said. “We don’t want the two folks missing to go ‘this is an important opportunity to establish the thoughtfulness and deliberate method in considering a change in an already adopted policy, regardless of the subject of the policy.’”

Ely reread the line about excluding memorials for students who died of suicide.

“That line was adopted in 2012,” Ely said before he addressed Holzschuh. “You know, because this subject, you are living it every minute of every hour of every day. There are 49 pages on this subject just in one resource. There are seven state statutes just on this topic, governance from the state of Missouri on this subject. There are national resources on all levels on this subject. The most important thing from this evening, as we navigate the next four or five days — which we will. I think there should be comfort and confidence that it should be healthy but there again needs to be thoughtfully delivered. It is the same process we need to establish in all considerations.”

Ely said he thought to share the insight so that there would be respect given to the family and every member of the board.

“The process can be bumpy, but it is a process that works,” he said. “It needs to be thoughtfully delivered and take the time to educate, the same thing we ask our students to do. I think for a board and as community members, we look at how we handle difficult subjects. How do we, role model? How does that look on social media? There is a lot of value to what we can accomplish this next week and tonight. It was really important to me to try to continue the conversation.”

Ely said he spoke with someone from the Belle community and this is a “subject that happens too frequently.”

Ely said having the conversation about mental health would be lacking if they didn’t discuss the resources and support available for mental health.

“The most valuable part of the conversation is how we affect the family who is dealing with this day in and day out?” he said. “How do (we) educate and provide that support as a student, as a parent, as a neighbor, or as a community before (suicide) happens? I lost a nephew under similar circumstances last year. No one saw it coming. Nobody wants to have familiarity with this subject, but we need to address it openly and honestly. The world’s a little bit crazy and we need more support from each other in order to make good things happen.”

Ely asked board members if they had a chance to review the documentation and asked for questions or comments.

“The MSBA policy as it was drafted in the revision on Jan. 31, 2022,” Ely said. “It has been 11 years since the Owensville Policy was adopted. Are there any questions about the MSBA policy as presented without revisions?”

Ely explained further that MSBA provides the district with suggested policies as part of the district’s membership and the names of the policies are lettered.

“I think everyone has a sense that a death is a death,” Ely said to the board’s silence. “There needs to be a way to grieve and support. Expected or unexpected, it has an impact, between now and forever. It is the nature of it. I don’t know anyone on the board he doesn’t feel different than that.”

He said they will navigate the process regardless of the subject.

Director Joyce Lowes asked for clarification.

“The last two sentences of the policy are the lines that would go away?” she asked. Ely agreed.

“Everything below “Temporary” on the current policy that we have was not in the MSBA policy,” Hardy said.

Ely clarified that the originally drafted MSBA policy did not include death by suicide from being acknowledged.

“We are considering adopting the MSBA policy without this wording,” Ely said.

Ely said he expects the other board members to be in one accord with the changes to the policy but also wants to give them a chance to express their views at the Aug. 15 meeting. Some board members will be available via teleconference.

“I think there is really a consensus, but it is important to be respectful, not just of your request but to the whole board’s opinion on this subject and any subject,” Ely said. “What you are asking is not outside what we know to be a reasonable request.”

Ely noted gathering a group that is taking last-minute vacations and have families event scheduled a last-minute meeting is not easy, but the group made it happen. He ensured the group that the meeting was announced legally and on time as the board is subject to obey Sunshine Law.

“We announced this workshop at 4:26 p.m. yesterday,” Ely said about the Thursday afternoon meeting announcement. “It was sent by email but was set before that. Other than executive session all of our meetings are Sunshine. It is a legal requirement. It should build confidence that all of our meetings are intended to be a discussion. We need to hear from you. We have some unique needs.”

Ely said the meeting still met requirements, despite being scheduled the day before.

“This subject is important enough that we pulled this together as quickly as we could. I think you know that and we know that we have two people who are part of the board who need to be a part of the conversation. This board does not know what (the last two sentences) were put into place.”

Before the board’s adjourning, directors took time to compliment the students on going through the process to change policy.

“I want to acknowledge the students who are here,” director Molly Steinbeck said. “I think it has been super cool to watch you guys over the past several years remembering Drake. It has been a true testament of what a great kid he was living through you all.”

Director Russ Farrell also spoke to the group.

“This is to all of the youngsters out there because I know most all of you pretty well,” Farrell began. “This is how you change things when you feel strongly about something. You get together, you get a spokesman, say what is on your mind, say the reason, and it gets changed or it gets looked at. If it is possible it gets changed. Or if it’s not possible, maybe it doesn’t. Throwing a fit and screaming like that gentleman did is not the way you change things. It is appreciated that you guys stepped up and did it the right way.”

Hardy said going through the process can be hard. Talking to the building administrator first, then the superintendent, and finally the board.

“Once Ms. Holzschuh reached out, that process started on Aug. 2,” Hardy said. “The board wasn’t blindly in the dark. I started immediately researching. Sometimes those conversations are hard, and they are even hard for adults. If you want to make a change, go through that process. Come to me. If I say there is a policy, the next step is to go to the board if you want to make a change. This is a great example of Drake’s mom and dad, following the process.”

The board was expected to take action on Aug. 15 during a special meeting at the Administration Building. They voted 5-0 to close the 55-minute workshop.